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Friday, January 11, 2013

In Desperate Need of Prayer

Hello my wonderful prim friends. I am coming to you with a heavy, heavy heart...it's almost 6 am and, as usual, I haven't even drifted off to la-la land yet. As I was sitting and talking to my son yesterday around 4pm we heard the bells jingle on the kitchen door and in walks the hubs...This is surprising cuz he generally works till 8 or 9 pm. I immediately thought he must be sick, although he never, ever misses work even though he's on salary, he normally just works through the pain or discomfort.

When I saw his face I knew something was terribly wrong and he broke down and said that he had been let go from the company for which he has worked the last 9 years. I was not stunned since they have been systematically getting rid of most senior managers and even though the hubs and I had talked about the possibility of this happening, I don't really think he ever really thought it would happen to him....he works harder than any human being that I know..he gives it his all...and he has never been fired, ever ! He has made this company millions of dollars and has been in the Bronze Club for profit every single year except 2012...apparently the big wigs don't understand that the economy is bad here, nor do they care that the bus routes to the shopping center where the hubs store is have twice been cut this year. They dont seem to care that almost all the stores in that shopping center have closed and now 2 schools have taken their place, not to mention that you cant see the hubs store from the road and the company has refused his many requests for a sign.

They made him sign a non-compete agreement 3 years ago just two days before they rolled out the new bonus program...so basically he can not even look for a job in the same field within a certain mile radius. Oh and that new bonus structure they instituted....he ended up losing over $50,000 in gross bonus over the last 3 years...But he thought it was best to stick it out with the economy being like its been. He was apprehensive at maybe quitting a place he had seniority and a good record to take a job where he would be low man on the pole etc.

And then of course theres the issue of his health benefits which were the real reason I think he stayed there. As most of you know I have been ill since 2003 when I got neuro-invasive west nile virus which left me in a lot of pain and in need of a lot of medication/treatment. As I am typing this I am having my first bout of worry and fear even though I spent the entire evening reminding the hubs that God has been and always will be, our provider and that we have been through tougher spots than this...but ladies, if truth be told, I am more than a little nervous.

This all comes on the heels of my tooth breaking over the holidays and no I hadn't gotten around to seeing to it yet because my car died on me on Christmas eve...we thought we had it fixed and my son took it to his girlfriends house and it died there and we had to have it towed again...just got word that the engine needs replaced to the tune of $2500 which is more than the car is worth, so we are down to one vehicle and trying to figure out if there's a way to get any money for the car at this point.

I am tired gals, just really , really tired but I have got to hold it together !
So today I am asking for your prayers...prayers that he finds another job, prayers that I dont run out of medicine before he gets another job, prayers that I can keep it together and be strong for him, prayers that we can weather this storm with integrity and character.

I know God loves us and I know He has a perfect plan for us...I just need to be quiet so I can hear what it is. We do have a tiny bit of savings in the bank  and my wool sales might need to be in the budget instead of "fun" money. I keep trying to tell Jim (aka the hubs) that it will all be ok but I am fearful that I am not making a compelling argument and I am afraid he can see right through me and see the fear. We can live on very little...we have done our best to not have too much debt but I am worried about the expense of my medical needs since it bankrupted us when I was first sick and I just cant go down that road again. We have finally been able to dig ourselves out of that hole and I just dont want to be smothered again !

I am sorry, I think I am just rambling now and worrying out loud...forgive me please for laying this out in what's supposed to be a fun blog about rug hooking and primitive decor but many of you have become my very dear friends...when you are housebound due to illness like I am for sometimes days and even weeks at a time, friendships fade because people get tired of asking you to do things only to have you cancel at the last minute because you couldnt lift your arms over your head to wash your hair or that you had never been able to get back upstairs because the steps were just too much to navigate or the pain was too intense or that you hadnt slept in several days and you just couldnt even talk on the phone because your hands hurt too much..but you guys, well, even though you are real people, you are in my virtual world where the expectations are different...

Gosh this is all just coming out wrong so I think I will just stop for now. Again, please pray for Jim and I...we have a good solid marriage but I know this is a blow to his ego and he takes great pride in his work and I just feel like I am a huge burden that cant contribute very much (I know thats not at all how he feels, but it is how I feel).

Until next time,
Grace to you,
Margie

36 comments:

  1. Praying for you and your Family friend.
    Sending you a big hug too.
    Woolie love
    Trace

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  2. Oh Margi, will keep you and your family in my prayers......Warm Blessings Francine.

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  3. Prayers Margie for you and your family

    you need to check on that insurance though and get things done NOW!! by law I believe you will still be covered for 30 days, or should be anyway


    will keep you in my prayers

    Hugs
    Brenda

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  4. Margie... praying for you and Jim... but knowing that the Universe has a greater plan for you both... Take one day at a time. Sending prayers and hugs...

    PS. Ditto on what Brenda said, you should be covered under Cobra Insurance for at least 30 days (it may even be longer). Also... inquire about the contract - since Jim was let go on the Company's terms, maybe it nullifies the contract.

    Sending love your way.
    Karen

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  5. Margie... I am a new follower to your blog, but want you to know I am deeply deeply here as a friend, follower and true believer that God will hold you all up it may not feel like it at times, but I truly believe the saying when a door closes another will open, when they don't believe me a window will... hang tight, do as the others suggested use that insurance now you have time get the dental work and your medicine.. Hugs to you and your family please use this blog as a way to vent as well as a stress reliever and as intended a source to your wools and creativity..

    blessings
    ~Rhonda~

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  6. ((((Hugs))) to you and Jim. I will keep you in my prayers. I know it is difficult to stay positive, but keep trying and keep having faith. I won't go into it here, but myself and my hubby are also in the midst of some huge life stuff(his name is James too :) ). I know things will work out and God has always provided for us, but I do get into slumps of despair at times and I have to remind myself of all our blessings and as long as we have each other and the family, we can make it. You will make it too, stick together and stay strong, and never stop praying.

    Tiff

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  7. Sending Prayers to you and your Husband!

    Sandi

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  8. Margie, I will be praying for you and Jim. I know it made sound like a religious answer but God is faithful. Search back through your life and look at the times He has been faithful and stand on those promises. God did not bring you to this point in your lives to desert you. In our family and business we have had to make some drastic changes during the past few years because of this economy but God has been faithful. You use your blog community to help you, take the advise and use your insurance until it runs out. Contact the drug companies that make your meds and see if there is financial help for you. Prayers and Blessings my sister in Christ!

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  9. My heart goes out to you, Prayers and good thoughts for you and your DH. I agree with starting the COBRA. Also talk to your pharmacist. We recently had a money problem involving my father's new medication and the pharmacist gave us so much help which resulted in out talking to dad's doctor and saving dad hundreds of dollars a month.

    Reach out to everyone.Letting everyone know what's going on gives you a better chance to someone helping. You never know who has an inside tip on jobs.

    My DH who had worked for a certain company for 12 years and had a flawless record was let go and DH right away retained a HEAD HUNTER who helped DH find a job. The HEAD HUNTER was paid by certain companies to find eligible employees so we didn't have to pay the HEAD HUNTER.

    Sending you PRAYERS-HUGS and GOOD THOUGHTS.

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  10. Oh Margie-My heart goes out to you and your sweet hubby. It does seem that companies now a-days only see the bottom line, and don't realize how devastating it can be to lose a job, especially at our age.
    I'll pray like crazy for you. Sending lots of hugs.

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  11. Hugs and prayers to you both. Things WILL work out, but it doesn't make it any easier right now. His health insurance should be good at least through the end of the month, at which time you can purchase COBRA insurance - but it is expensive and you can generally get your own coverage for much less. Also - non competes rarely stand up in court, because they can not keep him from making a living. It will be ok!!!

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  12. Our prayers are with you and your family just think of all that you have managed through and know that soon this will be just one more to add the list. Think outside of the box for jobs, seems that a noncompete agreement would only be valid if you left the company not if the company left you? Know that we are here when you need to vent as that does a person so much good.

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  13. I went through this a few years ago with my DH. Other than the financial worry the hardest part was being their for DH, knowing when to speak and how to build him up. I kept reminding him of what an awesome job he had done over the years and his successes---this took place when he had gotten over the shock and things had settled down a little. My heart hurts for both of you, I'll be praying for you.

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  14. I am praying for you and your family. My family went through the same thing a few years ago. It was terribly hard, but we have survived. I believe you will too.

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  15. So sorry to hear of all of this, I will pray for you both. Have been down a similar road, can relate a tiny bit to the situation. God in His mercy will help, sometimes it just takes awhile to find the right steps to take.

    Just wondering if there is any kind of medical place there that helps based on income, since he will not have his for a time, you would be in a much lower category. Here there is a place that helps with a sliding income scale for a general doctor, and with medications. Please call social services and anyone else medical there who might know who to ask, hopefully you can find some help to get your medications until he gets his new job.

    praying for you through all this, hugs

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  16. Dear Margie...Of course I will be praying for you guys ...We all know the power of prayer and what a merciful, loving and gracious God we have !!!
    Please , don't be afraid to ask for help...don't be afraid to email, call or text when things are overwhelming....
    I believe with all my heart that there is something down the road...Bigger...Better ...
    Love ya,
    Robin

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  17. Hey sweetie,
    We have gone thru some very similar(yet very different) cirmcumstances these past 3 yrs. w/my hubby's job situation and let me tell you I have seen God work in miraculous ways, even w/hardly no income coming in and yet God still meets our daily needs. Boy, I could write a book about how my emotions/faith have weathered up and down, but sometimes God allows us to go some terribly tough times to really get to KNOW Him better and strengthen our faith, etc. Here's a sweet quote for you that really helped me ~
    "God knows the stubborn human heart. He knows that if He is to accomplish His deepest work, He must take us into the desert in order to give us the privilege to be used in His Kingdom. In the desert God changes us and removes things that hinder us. He forces us to draw deep upon His grace. The desert is only a season in our life. When He has accomplished what He wants in our lives in the desert, He will bring us out. He has given us a mission to fulfill that can only be fulfilled after we have spent adequate time in preparation in the desert. Fear not the desert, for it is here you will hear God's voice like never before. It is here you become His bride. It is here you will have the idols of your life removed. It is here you begin to experience the reality of a living God like never before. Someone once said, "God uses enlarged trials to produce enlarged saints so He can put them in enlarged places!"

    He brought me out into a spacious place; He rescued me because He delighted in me (2 Samuel 22:20).

    Praying for you!
    Tanya

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  18. I am so sorry you are going through this. The same thing happened to our family three years ago. I was five months pregnant at the time and worried about insurance as well. You should be covered under Cobra for up to a year, though we had to pay for it, it was still far cheaper than individual insurance would have been. My husband is also the sole provider in this family and though I looked for work when he was fired no one would hire a very visibly pregnant woman esp since I have been a stay at home mom for so long. It too truly hurt my husband to be made as he called it "unnecessary" and for a year it took not only a toll on us financially but our marriage suffered as well. I don't know that there was any way to have avoided that but we did come out the other end. Hang in there and my thoughts are with you.

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  19. Margie,

    YIKES! Sending you hugs my friend. there is nothing to prepare one when the rugs gets pulled out from under them like that. Breath and I hope you got some rest. They keep telling us it's soo much better, I just don't see it...sigh...Hang in there and again sending you hugs! thinking of you! OLM

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  20. Margie dear friend,I am sitting here with tears flowing as I know how bad this affects the both of you.Wish I was close enough to give you a big hug.I have been scared to death that this is what we will be facing,Hubs is laid off again this week but like you say we will make it.Know that we(hubby and I ) are praying for you and your family.Love and hugs,Jen
    P.S.You can email me anytime you need to.

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  21. I am so sorry to hear about your husband's job...Don and I have been through it...he lost his job of 30 years...they laid off a ton of people...all the high earners...he went into another field and there were times I didn't think we were going to make it through...we were lucky...then I lost my job 3 years ago after my company got gobbled up by CVS...I worked there for 25 years...have faith...hugs and prayers headed your way!

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  22. Margie ~
    Hugs and prayers coming your way.
    Lauren

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  23. Dear friend,

    I have walked beside you down this kind of difficult road before. There isn't much hardship that you have not faced in your lifetime. Fear and worry are enemies to your your health. Lay it at His feet and don't fear tomorrow. It really can't be any worse than what you two have already walked through together. Some of our greatest fears in life or our deepest sufferings are actually God's gifts in disguise. I love you, dearly. Please hug Jim for me and ask him to hug you back.

    Heidi

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  24. Does your church have a group for unemployed/job hunting? Maybe a lawyer could volunteer info on the non-compete stuff. Insurance can be bought after severance ends, it just costs a lot. If the company gives a few days with a job search firm, have him take advantage of it. Go to the unemployment office asap, as benefits don't start until you go. Just remember, God will provide.
    Laura

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  25. Margie, so very sorry to hear about your hubs job. This economy is not good--companies are still laying off workers. My prayers are with you. Feel free to vent anytime, I'm hear to listen.

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  26. Margie, my heart leapt when I read yourletter. Things happen when we least expect it; but pray to God, things will work out real soon for you and your hubby. Rest assured you will be mentioned more than once in my prayers..there is power in prayer as many of us already know.
    Hugs to you...

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  27. Sending up prayers Margie. I know what it feels like to be fired from a job and thought it was the end of the world for me, but it wasn't. I found a new one that was much better. And I had signed a non compete contract, but they could not enforce it because they fired me~ I wasn't the one to leave on my terms. Take a day at a time, God always provides when we need it most.
    Blessings,
    Jean

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  28. so many have been laid off after the President was reelected..almost a million people so far with more in the future..so sad.
    My husband lost his job in 2006, and its been a uphill battle since then. God has always provided so take heart. A new door will open.
    The Lord opened a door for us with our own business.

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  29. Margie, I feel so sorry for you. I don´t really know you as I´m quite new on your blog but when I read all what you write and HOW you write it I´m absolutely sure that you both will soon get out of this hole again. You musn´t see yourself as a burden because a wife who is so full of love and appreciation for her husband could never be. Lay yourselves in the hands of God and he will leed and bless you. I wish you all the strength, love and confidence to sail this ship into still water again. Love, Britta

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  30. Oh, Margie, I am so sorry to hear about this. It sounds to me like there might be some age discrimination in play...I do firmly believe that somehow everything seems to work out in the end. You are certainly NOT a burden, and I;m sure your hubby thinks you are a blessing. Have faith, everything will be ok.

    Hugs,
    Melinda

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  31. I am so sorry to hear the fear in your thoughts as you wrote that post. I too, can't work because of my illness and health issues. My hubby works and does not make me feel bad or quilty about being stuck at home. I am fortunate to have taken out long term disability insurance when I started a new job in 2004! I get one check a month and it isn't anywhere near what my two paychecka a month were, but it helps out a bunch. I will add your family to my prayer journal and if it is ok, I will pass it on to my prayers partners!
    Hang tight! Call the companies that make your drugs, you may be able to get help from them for your meds. Also check and see if any of the local agencies have pharmacies in their list of ways they offer help. I know my Mother can't afford all of her meds and she gets help from some local agencies for two or three of her meds.
    Again, hugs and prayers for you and your hubby!
    Hugs,
    Lynn

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  32. Margie, I am so sorry to hear this! Keep the faith, there must be a plan for you, when one door closes, another opens. Don't feel like you are a burden, you would not want your hubby to feel that way, if your situation was reversed. He loves you and pledged to love you for richer, for poorer, through sickness and health. Hang in there and check out everything that everyone has told you about and we all are praying for you both.

    Bear Hugs & Blessings~Karen

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  33. Check out the web site... needymeds.com. You can look up your meds and check with the pharmaceutical manufacturers to see if they have a program that can supply you with your meds. Many drug companies have such programs. Plus get a head set for your phone... you should be able to plug a head set into your phone so you don't have to hold it. Good luck... somehow it always works out.
    Ellen

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  34. Big hugs Margie! My Jim lost his job of 16 years, a year and a half ago. He wanted to find something before but he kept hanging on there. Sorry to hear of this happening to your family. Sending prayers and positive thoughts.

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